Photograph of someone with their head between their hands, looking out a window, with the words "why are you ashamed?"

The Yes I Kan Podcast Ep. 13: Breaking the Chain of Shame and Secrecy from Your Story with Nancy Barrows

Rather than letting her shame define her, this guest turned her pain into power

Growing up, Paul Kan was always told to keep things to myself, to not share or say too much and to stay silent about anything that wasn’t considered honorable and respectable. As he toggled back and forth between Asian values in his home and western values outside of his home, he realized that there was a common ground that existed between the two—the prevalence of shame. In this episode, Paul has a powerful conversation with Nancy Barrows as she shares how she broke through the shame of being a sexual abuse survivor and turned her pain into her purpose. They discuss why shame robs us of deep connection, how we can create compassionate spaces for people around us to open up and how to break the cycle of shame in our lives especially around taboo topics like sex. 

To find out more about Nancy, visit her on LinkedIn at

Hosted by Paul Kan

Paul Kan is a High Performance and Executive Coach, Talent Development Specialist, TEDx Keynote Speaker, and Host of the Yes I Kan Podcast. After almost a decade of sales and leadership experience managing multi-million dollar portfolios with billion dollar brands, he left corporate to pursue a more meaningful path. He has spent the past two years coaching over 300 corporate and individual clients from CEOs to Olympians to up-level their Emotional Intelligence capability, develop diverse talent and bring out the best from their teams. Today, he is on a mission to empower and inspire others to create their best version of an extraordinary life with joy, authenticity, and freedom.