Asian women on TikTok are showing us how to age gracefully
These content creators are using their platforms to clap back against ageism on social media
From left, EJ Dongan, Cynthia Gouw, and Natalie Bright are just a few of the Asian women fighting ageism on social media.
Photo illustration by Ryan Quan
Words by Kaila Yu
When Michelle Yeoh won the Oscar for Best Actress in 2023—the first Asian woman to do so—she told women, “Ladies, don’t let anybody tell you you’re ever past your prime.” It wasn’t the first time the 62-year-old actress had spoken out about ageism, and her ongoing advocacy may be helping to counter the still-pervasive idea that the older we get, the less important or relevant to society we become. The conversation around age is becoming more widespread—not just with women in the public eye, but also on social media.
As people of Asian descent continue to be targets of racist attacks in the United States, with Asian women subjected to a higher frequency of hate crimes, visibility in any form may be one way to fight against racism. This activism may come from an unexpected place—a pack of Asian women leading the charge against ageism on social media. Popular accounts include EJ Dongan, a mother launching a first-time modeling career; Cynthia Gouw, a 58-year-old seasoned model teaching posing techniques; and Natalie Bright, who is defying expectations of how Gen-X women should dress.
“People expect me to be a stay-at-home mom who lets her looks go,” Dongan says. Instead, at 43 and with two kids, aged 10 and 14, she’s launched a career as an influencer and model. At first, her husband and family were frustrated she quit a prosperous, stable job in the medical industry to pursue unorthodox dreams. Eventually, they came around as her success snowballed after she started posting on TikTok in December 2019. She believes that her success also shows her kids and followers they can begin pursuing new ambitions at any age.
“I’m at the middle of my life now, if I live until 100, and I want to enjoy my next 50 years, not be stuck at a nine-to-five,” Dongan says. However, she hasn’t been immune to ageist reactions on her journey, particularly about how women 40 and older should look or dress.
“Ok 52 year old auntie,” one commenter snarks on her TikTok, attempting to insult her by tacking on nearly a decade to her age. Dongan’s response? Appearing makeup-free in glasses and oversized pajamas and transforming into a black bikini top and micro-mini skirt, challenging cheekily: “You’re right; I look like the Korean grandma in your local H-Mart!"
Bright relays a similar perspective. “If you age naturally, people say, ‘She really let go of herself.’ If you dress younger, get work done, dye your hair, or do crazy makeup, they say, ‘That lady’s crazy; she’s trying too hard.’ So where’s the sweet spot? I want to shine a more positive light on aging.”
Bright pivoted to age-positive content after posting viral videos on the topic. In early 2023, she posted a video revealing her age that suddenly ratcheted to more than a million views in a month and is now at 11 million views and led to open discussions, as well as some surprising reactions. Some comments on that video include, “As someone in my 20s, this is so happy to see… people in their 40s embracing their age with joy. Very comforting 💛,” and “Following you right now! I’ve been having so much age anxiety and I’m in my early twenties 😫.”
Rosemary Cordeiro, a mother of four, also posts videos to inspire her audience, showcasing that “life doesn’t end after 40. We can still have fun, dance, be silly, laugh, dress like we want, and do what we want, regardless of what societal beliefs and norms are for women my age, especially now at 50 years old.”
Helping to ease the fear of aging is important as ageism has been proven to drastically and negatively affect physical and mental health, according to Yale University professor, psychologist, and aging expert Becca Levy. Levy wrote the book Breaking the Age Code: How Your Beliefs About Aging Determine How Long and Well You Live and her research has found that positive age beliefs can improve life expectancy by up to seven and a half years.
Gouw, 58, a former Elite model and three-time Emmy award-winning journalist, also aims to reframe aging and stop the use of the term "anti-aging." Instead, she highlights pro-aging, reframing the belief that it must be prevented. She publishes a mix of skincare secrets, posing tips, and inspirational affirmations. Her audience in her comments section celebrates getting older along with her, often rejuvenated by her content. Other popular pro-aging influencers include Marni, a 70-year-old positive aging creator, and 63-year-old Gym Tan.
Beyond inspiration, these social media accounts can help fight negative stereotypes with positive representations of Asian women on social media, especially following the noticeable rise in anti-Asian hate perpetuated by former President Donald Trump, who called COVID-19 the “Chinese virus.” In addition, research found that demand for diverse content has surged in recent years. Although these pro-aging creators publish lighthearted and playful content, any positive media representation can help humanize groups against racism and help create compassion, empathy, and understanding.
“To fight anti-Asian hate, any kind of multi-dimensional representation is powerful,” Gouw says. “People often target communities who are invisible. When they actually see us, it creates a lot more empathy and understanding.”
Published on September 18, 2024
Words by Kaila Yu
Kaila Yu is a writer and on-camera correspondent in Los Angeles who loves eating. Her bylines have appeared in The New York Times, Los Angeles Times, Conde Nast Traveler, and many more. Watch out for her debut memoir Fetishized in August 2025 from Crown Publishing.
Art by Ryan Quan
Ryan Quan is the Social Media Editor for JoySauce. This queer, half-Chinese, half-Filipino writer and graphic designer loves everything related to music, creative nonfiction, and art. Based in Brooklyn, he spends most of his time dancing to hyperpop and accidentally falling asleep on the subway. Follow him on Instagram at @ryanquans.